just delightful

I bought myself this t shirt in a sweatshirt .. well, it is my size, however fits like a sausage casing .. not the best view ... in my opinion ...

bad week for internet shopping -- I got a pair of lounge pants -- it's like a sweater pants .. seriously -- knitted like a sweater -- heavy, well made and 3 sizes to large ... a pair of expensive capri jeans -- again -- to large    and the above mentioned sweatshirt.

the weather is frightful -- gotta love a Blizzard warning on 3/31 to 4/1

I'll just keep working.

 

25 years later

this is my favorite tornado picture 

25 years later ....

we'd relocated to the porch at the farm and were up and running, Nick didn't have daycare, Jean was working 24/7 at the bank, Lee & Dad were keeping the shop running, Mom was coming home from Montana -- so, it was Cathy, Nick and I ... 

shit got done.

oh, the memories of that month, summer, aftermath.  so many memories, endless memories -- so good, some not so good ... I'm just trying to roll with all of them today and not be overwhelmed.  

I seem to get overwhelmed by everything lately.  Software was not accessible last night from home -- issues with citrix.  ugly shit.  I lost my shit.  I did a rough count and I think we have 350 returns to finish -- and that scares the hell out of me.

Winter weather advisory for Friday and Saturday -- wtf -- seriously, wtf.  

 

03/26/23 and on Saturday's

we work and

I took a spot of time to play

my SxS started to I took a drive down to the mailbox (slowly thru the mud) and down the township road -- just to blow the cobwebs from my mind (and the SxS)  I was surprised it fired right up .. then I took a walk around -- found Ruby .. checked out the snow pile behind the shed -- walked part way out to the field -- or as far as I could get .. wet feet turned me around 

then I went to the cave to be productive 

lots to do yet, lots

mom and I took the Sunday afternoon drive out to the lake .. ice is getting whiter .. still a lot of snow the camera managed to catch me slipping and falling twice -- in 10' ... first it was icy boardwalk and second -- the snowbank gave way ... it was entertaining ..

 

03/24/23 a month

it is a month today 

I think we're adapting to a new "normal" and new routines, my schedule is so out of norm that adjustments happen hourly.

I haven't had to plow snow yet (and I am grateful), I've got a whole list of numbers in my cell phone to call for help -- the little things can be overwhelming, the big things -- we tackle with a lot of determination.

I think I have a vehicle swap plan in place -- now to make the stars align.

One gets sold, one goes to Nick, one gets traded in -- I get a different one, Mom gets a different one and Jean gets a new one. It's a shuffle.  stars must align.  

Need Spring and warmer weather -- I am so tired of winter -- well, just plain tired.  

Today is another day in my shit show.  client gigs with, well, whining clients.  my truck goes to the repair dude, check engine light is on (whoa) -- the sun is shining and tonight I hope to see the northern lights - I slept thru everything last night 

This weekend, the black truck comes out - a mini cruise somewhere .. and more tax returns, the endless supply of tax returns.   maybe even my own tax return

and Ruby II .. the one with the check engine lite ... well, it was the flapper / sensor in the gas tank -- the cap-less gas tank has a flap where you shove in the pump nozzle -- it didn't flap back after my last gas fill .. ... the fix it dude compared it to the "flapper in the crapper" only the gas tank ... $275 later the flap is flapping and the oil has been changed .. it even got a wash this week .. less mud .. and here is the best comment 

"man, that's a pretty nice truck " .. ya, it is .. 

 

AAB - Attitude Adjustment Break

tulips and rabbit poop ...

at this juncture in life

both are a welcome sight

snow is leaving the 'hood .. rather quickly

took a drive -- the snow drifts in the front yard are higher than the steps .. lots of melting needs to happen -- lots 

ahhhh -- in 28 days I have a day off ... hopefully - most of the white will be gone -- I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed .. I need my beach time.

03/21/23 8:47 pm ...

   Another 3:30am start -- I'm starting to get way to acclimated to the early am schedule .. argh.  Today was doctor appointment day -- I've changed it 3 times.  Here's the scoop -- I weigh exactly the same as last year, ditto the blood pressure and ... my blood work came back almost identical.  wtf. 

   Client called today -- I listed her occupation on her tax return as RETIRED !!!  .. she was thrilled with it .. she would be the only happy person on third street today .. argh (double argh) complete chaos all day long.  I was chasing myself all damn day.  

    Time for bed.  Tomorrow is a new and exciting day -- so she says.

 

more ramblings

03/16/23 8:25 pm 

I searched thru the pix archives and found this one from 2013's St Patrick's Day Parade .. 

I came home shortly after 6:00 tonight -- the weather is awful (well, it could be worse) and working from home seemed like a good plan for the evening.  The office chaos continues -- I'm clueless on what is done, what needs to be done and even what freaking day it is.  

I keep plugging along.  It's all I can do.   I'm trying.  

I ordered a $100 gizmo on Amazon, my big screen monitor works now.  

Our summer project will be to move all our data from TR servers in the cloud back to the closet server and control our own destiny.  Build a personal VPN and go to work -- I cannot deal with the inefficiencies of TR any longer -- Tuesday we were done for 3 hours.  3 hours of no work .. time is money and I get irked when things do not work.  We haven't received an acceptance letter since late Tuesday -- I've transmitted 65 tax returns and heard nothing.  Be patient -- my patience meter is stuck on nasty. 

03/17/23 9:02 pm

    Today, I'm struggling.  First of the firsts ... the parade -- up until the plague arrived he was a "float" driver -- if hauling people in the back of a truck is a float.  It is here.

    All day long, reminders kept popping up -- posting the above pix on wastebook wasn't the best idea I had -- then the flowers I had in a jar -- finally gave up .. and then 3:15 arrived and it was the 3 week mark.

    The weather for the parade was frightfully cold.  Dangerously cold.  I spun chairs around in the front room and watched from the comfort of a chair -- inside.  A client stayed and watched with me.  Kevin and Cameron were outside and dang near froze. 

    I miss my Dad.  Really bad today.  I'm tired, overworked, stressed out by the work gig and miss the perspective  -- those work 'til you drop life lessons haven't kicked in today.  My day started at 3:30 and I just quit -- that hour break for the parade, wasn't a break.  

   I gotta get a life.

 

03/14/23 3 years post plague

 

I tried to link to a blog post from 03/14/2020 yesterday -- it was the 3rd anniversary to our beginning of COVID and the ensuing shitshow.

this TobyMac blurb from wastebook is one of my favorites.  it resonates with me.

I'm not so silent this March -- it's just well, healing?, self care? me?

the office is still very chaotic -- I'm tired -- the 3:30am starts are beginning to get painful, especially with the daylight savings switcheroo -- I am, however, extremely productive from 3:30 am to 6:00 am -- work, laundry, body rework, litter box, laundry, work ... 

it's a life, or my crazy life

moments

 03/09/23

     the cards -- we've received a lot of cards, notes, calls, texts and emails.  the memories shared -- this is a whole new experience for us -- 

      mom seems to be at loose ends -- she's been cleaning/purging/running errands.  i've tried to suggest she not run up and down the driveway so much.  the mud pit can only handle so much traffic -- it doesn't phase her -- she's making trash deposits at the shop, donations to the various thrift shops and seems to be a daily visitor at the grocery store.   her comment was last night -- are you going downstairs to work .. yes, mom, i need to ..

      we are so behind at the office -- swamped is not the best description -- out of control chaos, robyn told me - it will get done .. jan keeps shaking her head and wondering out loud - how do you do it ... we had a full office for a couple of hours yesterday -- robyn, kevin, katie, me and regis ... desk space was at a premium ...

      we'll get there -- weather be damned.

03/09/23 7:25pm

    My first blurb today was really early ... like 4:30am ish.  Habits. 

    Today's moment -- I was deleting stuff off my phone and found a voice mail message from Dad -- he was calling from the hospital ( at ISJ in Mankato) -- left me a message and forgot to hang up ... 2 minutes of him talking to the nurse.  I couldn't listen to all of it .. I can barely type about it.  When it's not so fresh, I'll share it with the rest of the clan.  

    Tears over a voice mail message.  Being strong is hard.  A little moment .. I'm trying to figure out how to save it with my 8 million pictures on my computer.  Creepy, yes, but he sounded okay -- and that was the last time he sounded ok ..

03/12/23 7:35 

    Damn daylight savings time . it's throwing me for a loop on day 1 ... I keep thinking I'd oversleep so I was away at the old 2:45 ... came down to the cave and was really productive.  The copy crew will not be pleased in the morning.   Jan knocked out the easy ones before she went home -- she was busy girl today.  

    2 weeks and 2 days -- late this afternoon I was gathering the recycling from the porch and loading it into my truck -- found a box of "stuff" -- cords, chargers, can koozies, "stuff" .. kept a fancy pliers and well, tossed the rest -- Mom has kept herself busy cleaning and purging, lots of purging.  She could fill a dumpster a day if we let her ... some of it is getting repurposed/rehomed -- the plaid shirts are getting made into a quilt -- might be my Memorial Day, 4th of July, Labor Day project.  

   I am so grateful and overwhelmed by all the support, wishes and love -- it reaffirms my faith in the good of people -- I will be paying it forward.  

   I listened to the entire voicemail I found on my phone -- arguing with the tech if he needed an ultrasound on his legs or not .. the "double dipping" phrase was uttered a few times.  Might need a tee shirt with that phrase. 

  Cardinals were at the feeders tonight -- after I tossed the goodie box ... might be a message in their appearance -- 

new normal

 03/03/23  -- 6:09 am

     Today is seven days into our new normal.  It is so quiet at home.  I never (well, kind of) realized how loud the TV blared in the background of our daily routines.  Less laundry - sort of.  And damn, little piles of stuff all over the house .. weird stuff, the blood pressure cuff next to his chair, hats galore.  
      I found a "to do" list next to the recliner.  I'm going to frame it.
          -- cat house bench?
          -- post in showroom
          -- move snow w shop   (move snow west of shop)
          -- stand for sn ???
          -- CASE 

      Mom has been cleaning and purging during the day.  It keeps her busy -- I've tried to suggest she not go up and down thru the rock, ice and mud .. but she does anyway.  We're blessed with family and friends that keep a close eye on us.

      I told myself  - I was going to hold it all together today .. and well, I just lost it reading the "to do" list.   -- I have a full slate of appointments with clients that I might consider overly needy, some of them just are -- by their choice and by their own chaos.  I'll keep busy.  

      I have lost control of the office chaos -- I'm the spreadsheet tracking nut job and well, tracking nothing and have no clue what is or isn't completed.  Bad, that's just bad.

      --- on to the balance of my day I'm already 2 hours into it ...

03/05/23 9:04 pm

    I'm still upright, barely.  I slept in until 4:45 this morning .. a couple of hours of homework and laundry before heading to the office.  At least I remembered my phone today.  

   Our driveway is a mud pit.  Literally -- we should be limiting ourselves to one trip up and down per day and well, one of us is not showing that restraint.  It's that bad.  I spent an hour trenching water this afternoon -- not sure if it actually did any good.  

03/06/23 7:38am  

What a day -- the endless receiving line at the funeral home, so many family and friends from far and near.  I am in awe.  Old - young -- bad weather ... after the family service (that got a little larger than I was expecting) we moved to the Redmen.  

  And we had a party!  Minnesotans do not run out of food at funeral parties -- we were darn close ... less than 3 dozen sandwiches left -- a medium bowl of coleslaw and a med/large bowl of potato salad and oodles of dill pickles ... one box of zebra cakes ... we told the caterer to plan for 350 people -- :) 

  So much love -- and so many people pitched in and just did "things" .. the kitchen ladies -- Tammy, Shirley, Sandy and Rose ... just went to work .. the Johnson Family -- hauled everything out of the funeral home to my office ... it's pretty in here this morning .. we're going to pull flowers out of arrangements -- re-arrange and share them in the community room in the hospital and the assisted living ... the snowplow kid who shoveled my sidewalk after plowing the parking lot .. 

   The Duluth family members who drove down and left early to beat the weather -- the old neighbors .. came from up north -- all of them ... the kids over the decades that worked either at the shop or on the farm ... so many .... 

   I don't sleep past 3:30am any more -- I got up and went to the cave and worked for a couple of hours .. took breaks for laundry, body and washed up dishes ... 

  That damn cat got up on the kitchen counters while we were gone and got into the loaf of bread .. so I needed to change his litter box ...  he's going to send me to the loony bin -- 

  Today is a new day ... and we start all over with our new normal ... blessed by so much love.

   

03/02/23 snooze

it's March -- the month I usually embrace as operation blog silence 

sometimes I just spew and post later 

let's hope the white shit is gone when I return

(one should always dream big)

and I can hope all my piles of work are gone too .... we're overwhelmed and swamped with returns - I think I had a mini panic attack yesterday ... coffee helped (sort of ) ... 

later alligators!